Self-Care at Work: What Different Generations Get Right—and What We Can Learn from Each Other

Conversations about self-care and boundaries have become especially prominent in the workplace over the past several years. In a world that feels increasingly chaotic and demanding, that’s not surprising. People are looking for ways to protect their energy, avoid burnout, and stay functional in environments that often ask for more than they give.

What’s become clear to me, however, as I reflect on self-care and how it’s been approached over time, is that different generations bring different instincts to the conversation—and together, those instincts can create a more balanced, sustainable way of practicing it.

Older Generations: Endurance First, Self-Care Later

Self-care as an important workplace concept is still pretty new. For those of us who “came of age” in the workforce before the late 2010s or so, self-care wasn’t part of the professional vocabulary at all.

The implicit rules were pretty clear:

• Work comes first

• Push through exhaustion

• Be available, reliable, and grateful to have a seat at the table

• Go ahead and take a spa day every once in a while… but always keep your phone handy in case you need to respond to an email or step out for a call

Commitment was measured by endurance. Saying no felt risky. Taking a break felt less like a healthy reset and more like a failure of professionalism. Many of us barely took time off when we were genuinely sick, much less for a “mental health day.”

For these generations, the modern emphasis on boundaries and self-care can be an important corrective. Learning to rest, set limits, and recognize burnout as a real risk—not a personal weakness—holds the promise of helping many experienced professionals stay engaged and effective later into their careers.

At the same time, older generations often bring something essential to this conversation that’s worth naming. Many learned early on that work is fundamentally relational—that trust, mentorship, and shared responsibility don’t happen by accident. They understood that showing up for colleagues, investing in relationships, and taking ownership over time could make work feel more meaningful, not less.

Even without the language of “self-care,” there was often a deep appreciation for commitment, continuity, and the long game—an understanding that not all energy spent is lost, and that some forms of effort come back as connection, credibility, and purpose.

Younger Generations: Boundaries First, Then Engagement

Younger professionals, by contrast, are entering the workforce at a time when self-care language is already well established. Burnout warnings are explicit. Boundaries are encouraged. Mental health is openly discussed.

That awareness has brought real benefits—but it’s also created a different challenge.

In some cases, self-care is interpreted primarily as withdrawal: reducing demands, limiting emotional investment, opting out of situations that feel uncomfortable. Work is approached cautiously, with a strong emphasis on protecting time, energy, and personal life.

That instinct makes sense. Many younger workers watched their parents sacrifice too much for too little in return. But when self-care is framed primarily as minimizing discomfort, something important can get lost.

One of the underlying assumptions here is that energy is zero-sum—that any energy spent on work, people, or relationships is energy taken away from yourself. In reality, that isn’t quite how energy works.

When Giving Is Part of Self-Care

An often-overlooked aspect of self-care is that engagement can be sustaining.

Giving—your time, attention, effort, or expertise—becomes draining when it’s automatic, expected, or driven by fear. But when it’s chosen and aligned with your values, it can be energizing rather than depleting.

In the workplace, that kind of giving might look like:

• Mentoring a colleague

• Showing up consistently for a team

• Leaning into relationships that matter

These actions require effort—and sometimes discomfort—but they also create meaning, competence, and connection. They reduce isolation, increase trust, and make the day-to-day experience of work feel more human.

Investing in relationships is often a form of self-care in its own right. It makes work less lonely. It creates a sense of belonging. And for many people, it’s what turns a job from something you endure into something you can actually sustain.

Bridging the Gap

The tension between generations isn’t really about whether self-care matters. Most people agree that it does.

Older generations may still need to learn that rest, boundaries, and saying no are legitimate—and often necessary—for sustainability.

Younger generations may need to learn that self-care isn’t only about stepping back. Sometimes it’s about staying in: choosing engagement, responsibility, and contribution because those things align with who you want to be. Tremendous growth—and often unexpected energy—can come from stepping into discomfort rather than avoiding it.

The goal isn’t to embrace overwork or to reject boundaries. It’s to recognize that healthy self-care holds both:

• Knowing when to protect your energy, and

• Knowing when investing that energy is what actually sustains you.

In a healthy workplace, self-care isn’t just about avoiding burnout. It’s about intentionally building careers—and work environments—that are sustainable, connected, and meaningful.

By: Kandice Thorn, Founder, WorkBetter for Lawyers